Testifying to a few things I’ve seen and heard while hoping not to mis-remember any important facts;

I’ve been playing fantasy baseball for a decade now. In that time, this Red Sox fan can proudly attest to NEVER selecting a single New York Yankee. In fact, in the leagues where the drafts are automatically done by computer, I once ended up with Alex Rodriguez (usually the top-rated player) only to promptly trade him away before the regular season started. I’ve since begun eliminating all Evil Empire players from my draft board to ensure none of them graces my roster, even temporarily, ever again.

However, there’s going to be an exception to the rule in 2008. Andy Pettitte stays on the board, and if he’s available when his projected stats indicate he should be drafted, I’ll be proud to click on his name. Take that Roger the Dodger!

So let’s see if I scored this correctly; Clemens threw his wife, mother, best friend and agents under the bus during the course of his Congressional testimony, all to protect his image. Somewhere, John McNamara is raising a toast and telling anyone within earshot; “see, I told you the liar asked out in Game 6 of the 1986 World Series!”

That NBA Slam Dunk Contest has come a long way since the days when Dr. J, Michael, Dominique and Kobe ruled the roost. Now, not only do most superstars skip the spectacle, but the ones like Dwight Howard who do enter don’t even have to dunk the ball to win. A simple throw-in, provided you’re wearing a Superman cape while doing so, will get you the trophy and paycheck.

The new career of the Mill City’s resident boxing legend recently led him on a journey to his ancestors’ homeland. “Irish” Micky Ward spent four days in Ireland last month for negotiations to train Super Bantamweight Bernard Dunne. The former European Champion, who hasn’t fought since losing his title last August, is looking toward a return to the ring sometime this spring. Dunne, who sports a professional record of 24-1 and is ranked 9th by the WBO, had been trained by the legendary Freddie Roach when fighting in the United States, but was under the tutelage of Harry Hawkins across the Atlantic. After the loss in August, Dunne’s handlers wanted the Lowell legend to take over the reins.

Before leaving for Ireland, Ward expressed reservations about being so far away from his family for such an extended period of time, though he would have likely taken the job if the price was right. Ultimately, Dunne decided to stick with Hawkins and Ward is perfectly happy with the memories of a land he’d never before seen.

“The scenery was beautiful,” said Micky of the Galway coast. “I didn’t get a chance to do much sight-seeing, but the house I would have stayed at was right near the water. I’d go back in a heartbeat. I’m definitely taking a trip there again.”

Of course, had he gotten the training gig, the language may have been a difficult hurdle to overcome. According to Ward, “they spoke the old language, the real Gaelic. Even their English was hard to understand with the accents. They might as well have been speaking Greek,” he laughed.

Suffice it to say, the missed opportunity was a learning experience. Others will likely follow, so you’d better bone up on your languages there, Mick. And if a Greek boxer ever does require your services, I can think of one sports scribe who’d love to spend a couple of months on a Mediterranean Island acting as interpreter!