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Remember that Beavis and Butthead episode? The one where Beavis, wanting to prove he was a man, told his friend Butthead to “kick me in the Jimmy!”
Well, that’s what I felt like screaming around 8:50 p.m. Tuesday night. Go ahead David Stern. Take another shot at me and the rest of Celtics Nation. We’ve already been booted so many times before. What’s one more? Kick me in the Jimmy!
Tell me you didn’t feel like you’d taken a shot to the groin when Deputy Commissioner Adam Silver flipped over that card to reveal the Celtics logo in the #5 slot? My immediate reaction was to jump out of my seat and scream out a four-letter expletive (hint: rhymes with the thing hockey players shoot at the goalie). My guess is I wasn’t alone. Heck, next time they run that video on a local newscast, take a look at Silver’s face as he pulls the card out of the envelope. You can clearly see him raise his eyebrows, as if he didn’t believe what he was seeing.
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How come when the C’s are in the 7-13 bottom spots in terms of record, they never seem to jump up into a surprising top-3 pick? They always stay where they’re supposed to be, don’t they? Yet isn’t it funny how when the NBA has a direct benefit in a particular result, something wacky happens? Think I’m being paranoid? Consider:
Cleveland lands the #1 pick the year Akron, Ohio native LeBron James is available. Michael Jordan’s first year as Washington GM? Wouldn’t you know it, he gets #1. (Too bad for Stern MJ screwed it up by taking and destroying Kwame Brown) Great guy David Robinson needs someone to ride shotgun? Say hello to Tim Duncan, San Antonio. Orlando needs someone to pair up with Shaq, who they lucked into at #1 the year before? Lo and behold, they draw #1 (and Penny Hardaway) again the following year, even though they have the worst chance. Patrick Ewing coming out of college? You guessed it. Knicks win.
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Look, I know lotteries have unpredictable results. (Just look at the draft simulator from yesterday) But you have to admit it seems odd how things just seem to work out predictably when a Hall of Fame Caliber player is coming out of school. How can a professional league run such a ridiculous system? (And yes, I know hockey does something similar, but we don’t exactly confuse the NHL for a professionally run league now, do we?) The NFL (the best run of all leagues) goes strictly by record (except for the two Super Bowl participants) and everything seems to work out just fine for that league, doesn’t it?
The NBA instituted this ridiculous lottery because a couple of teams were obviously tanking the year Ralph “Bow-Wow” Sampson was the top prize, so they gave every non-playoff team a chance at the top pick, to discourage the bottom few from tanking. Great logic, huh? Now you have a whole bunch of teams mailing it in instead of one or two, and more often than not, the teams that need the help the most get it the least. What a stupid, stupid system, and I thought that long before last night or 1997!
Then again, it’s a system that allows for a little manipulation, isn’t it?
What are your thoughts on last night’s lottery fiasco? How did you react? Am I being paranoid, or do all these “coincidences” mean something fishy is going on? Where do the Celtics go from here?
P.S. If you think I flew off the deep end on this post, you should have seen what I wanted to write last night! Thankfully, I gave myself a few hours to cool off, otherwise I would have written a slew of things about how it would be poetic justice if Oden goes to Portland only to have Darius Miles and Zach Randolph turn him into a crack head-malcontent!
Comments (8)
I hate the NBA! I wish the Celtics could just boycott the NBA and play for another league.
Posted by T2 | May 23, 2007 4:10 PM
Posted on May 23, 2007 16:10
I guess in order to maintain sanity we equate Oden to Ralph Sampson/Pervis Ellison and Durant to any number of "can't miss" prospects picked at #2 who have certainly missed...
The biggest question now is what do the Celtics do now that this lottery is done? Do they trade some of their youngsters for veteran help and draft themselves, hopefully, a starter who can blossom or do they simply trade all of their assets besides Jefferson and Pierce (including this #5 pick) for veterans? In any case I'm sure Ainge and Doc don't feel as good about their job security as they did before the lottery started...
I don't think I buy any of the conspiracy theory stuff being floated around- it's a flawed system but in reality it's probably the best they can do and if the C's did, in fact, tank any games to try to improve their slot that thing called KARMA is what did this to them and not anyone in the NBA offices...
PS- Thanks for the Beavis and Butt-Head reference- used to be my favorite show back in the day...
Posted by dboisver | May 23, 2007 4:52 PM
Posted on May 23, 2007 16:52
I've been walking around in a daze the last 24 hours. I still can't believe it. As soon as I saw that dork's eyebrows rise up above his Harry Potter glasses I knew we were screwed. Looks like we have most of February (Pats win Super Bowl) and March off from sports again this year.
Posted by Greek Thunder | May 23, 2007 9:42 PM
Posted on May 23, 2007 21:42
The NBA Draft Lottery is apparently a Joke now more than ever! Plain and simple the team with the Worst record should get the First pick and so on. David Stern do what needs to be done!!!
Shappy
Posted by Shappy | May 23, 2007 10:41 PM
Posted on May 23, 2007 22:41
As much as Stern enjoys the Celtics misery I don't believe in conspiracy theories. Like you said the other day its just bad luck. That stupid espn draft thing showed how easy it is to get screwed.
They are screwed. If they had gotten third they could at least get a better trade and maybe get a better veteran player. Fifth is as useless to other teams as it is to Boston.
Posted by Tito's Terrors | May 24, 2007 9:41 AM
Posted on May 24, 2007 09:41
Tito, despite my cynical rant, I don't believe the lottery was "fixed." However, that doesn't mean the system in place isn't a disgrace.
First off, it allows for the "perception" that it can be manipulated, and often times, perception can be just as damaging to a reputation as reality. Secondly, professional sports leagues can do a lot worse than emulating the NFL. If a draft based strictly on record works for the most successful sports venture in the country, it should be more than good enough for 3rd and 4th tier leagues like the NBA and NHL.
And yes, you're right. The third pick could possibly have been used in a trade with Minny or Indiana. The 5th is a big drop off, perception-wise. (There's that word again!)
Posted by Teddy P. | May 25, 2007 12:42 PM
Posted on May 25, 2007 12:42
I don't think it's a horrible system but can probably use some tweaks. Maybe only allow a single team to move up from their slot? Once you pull one ball out of the top 4 or 5 where someone moved up you slot everyone else where their record indicates they should pick? (In a system like this you give Portland the #1 pick as they "won" the lottery but Memphis gets #2, the Celts #3 and so on??)
I like the idea of a system that prevents tanking just to get the #1 pick because in this age of the NBA with crazy "clearing cap"-type deals, in theory, a team could trade off all their bad contracts by the end of a season in which they're horrible and get the #1 pick PLUS have a ton of money to sign free agents and be able to go from an also-ran to dominant team overnight. The NBA is sort of a "special case" since each team has a relatively small roster, they don't really have a farm system of any kind, and you have a league where seemingly every player is a superstar or making the league minimum salary.
I dunno. I guess I'm not as against the system as most folks here seem to be but I'm not 100% in favor of the system they have today either...
Posted by dboisver | May 25, 2007 4:02 PM
Posted on May 25, 2007 16:02
The problem with this system, Dana, is that you actually get more teams tanking instead of the one or two that will finish with the worst record.
Boston and Memphis were the bottom two teams almost all year, but you suddenly had Milwaukee shutting down Redd and Bogut to get close to the Celtics, which led to that ridiculous game in Milwaukee where both teams basically sat out their entire starting fives. Look at the rest of that group. Other than Philly (strangely played for pride and got nothing to show for it) and the Clippers (in playoff race till last day), everyone else was shutting down players left and right the final month.
And let's not forget the 1997 Spurs, who shut down Robinson and slid all the way to the third worst record and Tim Duncan. That team won 50-games the year before. They had no business getting a #1 pick unless they finished with the worst record.
Not sure if there's a perfect system, because you'll always have teams tanking. But baseball and football seem to make out OK doing it by record alone.
As my hero Ron Burgundy says; "Agree to disagree!"
Posted by Teddy P. | May 25, 2007 4:57 PM
Posted on May 25, 2007 16:57