Just returned from Portland, Oregon (a painfully hip city) and came across something so startling, so over-the-top, I had to share it with my East Coast peeps. At local coffee roaster Stumptown (stumptowncoffee.com), beans sell for $95 a half pound. I was a little groggy when I first saw the sign, so it took me a second trip to the cafe (luckily it was in the lobby of the Ace Hotel where we stayed) to believe my eyes. The perfectly disheveled barista said this precious bean is fairly traded and roasted to order just the way you like it. I don't care if it was extracted from sheep dung in Scotland, I'm not buying this disgusting display of predatory capitalism. Those Left Coaster really now how to affront a frugal Yankee's sensibility. Imagine this flying in DTL? And here's the biggest rub: People actually fork over their cash to brew a few $20 cups at home. I paid $2 for a cup of French pressed coffee and $3 for the tastiest (and only) wildberry brioche I've ever had. I loved the Stump's French-pressed method and latte art, but was shocked by its balsy prices. This is extreme coffee drinking folks and it's headed our way. Stumptown opens in New York Fall '09, so start saving your pennies now. By then it will probably coast $105 for a quarter pound. We'll be lucky if we can afford a can of Bustello. As for the Ace Hotel (also headed for NYC) a fairly rockin' place to stay. We need a similar version in DTL. It's essentially an old flop house in former skid row, done over in industrial chic. (acehotel.com) The rooms have turntables and records at the front desk you can borrow. Bunkbeds and scratchy Pendelton blankets round out the jail-meets-boutique fun. There was a hoppin' restaurant attached called Clyde Commons where we dinned on pimento popcorn and fried chicken livers served by a waitstaff that looked like they wandered out of a Vincent Gallo pic. Those Portlanders sure like to mix it up. Guess ya gotta do something to entertain yourself when it rains 300 days out of the year. It's good to be back.